Center for Biblical Coaching

Thought I would thread this post that I blogged yesterday 3/26/09 on my blog. Hope it gives some encouragement in your journey. Thanks for reading.

Chanelle and I celebrated our 4th Anniversary as husband and wife today. Four years already, are you kidding me. It seems like yesterday we were standing in the living room of my Grandparents house exchanging vows. The attire was casual, very casual. Jeans and t-shirt to be exact. The big ceremony happened in June with all the fixings but that evening was special. As I look back I see where we were then and where we are now and can’t wait to see what the future brings. I have been lucky to marry who I consider my best friend. We have a great life together and I think for the most part we keep things simple.

Here are a Few Highlights over the first four years.

Year One – The Year of Loss:
The first year we had some major blows early on in our marriage due to loss. A month after we married my grandmother passed, my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer and underwent treatment (shes in remission now). Five months into our marriage, in August we found out that we were pregnant with our first child then in December at 14 weeks pregnant we lost Gabriel, and 6 days before our 1 year anniversary my cousin (best man at my wedding) passed away, the day before our anniversary we buried him so we didn’t really celebrate our one year.

That first year I think brought us close in a number of ways. The loss caused us to really focus on the other person and to just be there. A Lot of tears were shed that first year.

Year Two – Delivery
As year two pretty much started off with loss, we were dreading the upcoming due date of our First Son which we lost December prior. As may 28 drew closer a few days before mothers day my wife found out that she was pregnant with our second child which helped to heal some of the hurt we were feeling due to the loss of our first son. During year two we would have our second son (Peyton) and year two brought us close due to the issues that were present during the pregnancy. For a while there it was touch and go and after loosing our first we were expecting the worse but we had to comfort and be there once again for each other and ultimately ended year two with the birth of Peyton.

Year Three – New Baby, New House
In year three we purchased our first home. Still not sure if that has brought us closer or pulled us apart (just jokes) but we couldn’t be more thrilled about raising our son in our new house.

Year Three was quite an adjustment, and we are still adjusting. Balancing parenting and being a spouse can sometimes be challenging but we made it to year four.

Year Four – Didn’t know as much as I thought
I would say year four is finding out how much I don’t know. This wasn’t a ROUGH year but we had some challenges. Between communicating effectively and balancing time demands I think we have come a long way in year four. I have learned more about Chanelle in this year than I think I have in all three. We also found out that we are pregnant with our next Child.

Year Five – More to Come
As we start year five I can’t wait to see how it turns out. We will have another little one in the house come August. I imagine this will prove to be another year of adjustments because we are now moving from 3-4 and we will have to learn to better balance our time with each other and between two kids.

My personal goals for this next year of marriage is to stop sweating the small stuff. To be more relaxed and to communicate without yelling, and to really show Chanelle my love and support with my time and my attention. I want to get to know her all over again and want to model a leadership role in our marriage and home that she will be proud of and that my children can imitate as they grow.