Biblical Role of Women
Saturday, May 16th, 2009When I told one of the elders at my church what I was writing it on… he told me a funny story about his son. One day when his son was in class the teacher said, “today we are going to talk about the roles of women and men” and the little boy and one of his friends blurted out “women dont have roles, they make rolls!”
In today’s quick paced culture it is easy to conform to the changing times without notice. We are a society built on recognition and success, and when these dynamics permeate into our belief system, it can be challenging to identify and evaluate the impact they have on how we live our lives. One of the largest ways these values have influenced us is in our view of the roles of men and women. Women and men are equal in God’s eyes (gal 3:28), but different in function. There are obvious physical differences, but are there differences that expand into our roles in society, family, and the church? What does the Bible say concerning this? And does equal mean identical or impart interchangeability?
“In the beginning…” may sound like a nauseous journey back in time, but examining the way in which humanity was formed before sin will give us a better understanding of the simple roles we were meant to occupy. So, in the beginning God said let us make man in our image, and He did. Male and female he created them, and He called them “man” (gen1:26-27, 5:2; mat19:4; mark10:6). Adam was created first and God said that it was not good for him to be alone so, He created a woman, out of his side, for him (gen2:18-23). Women were created in the image of God for men and to be helpers suitable for them. God is Lord of men and women alike. God is the head of Christ, Christ is the head of men, and men are the head of women; this chain of authority is designed for order, not rank of importance (1Cor11:79).
First, let us consider the roles of women. Four passages that beautifully describe the role that women were created to fill are Titus 2:3-5, Proverbs 31, 1Pet 3:1-6 and 1Tim 2:9-15. Reverent, modest, sober, self-controlled, pure, kind, submissive, discrete, trustworthy, strong, generous, dignified, wise, gentle, chaste, respectful, and many other words such as these are used to depict the character of a righteous woman. She is said to be a woman who loves her husband, and has his trust, a woman whose work has the praise of not only her husband and children but also of the community. So what is her secret? She pursues and fills the role that she was created for. The idea of a “stay-at-home-mom” makes some laugh, while offending others, but it hasn’t always been this way. In Titus 2, along with other principles for women, it states that women should love their husbands and children, be workers at home, subject to their own husbands, and teach younger women to do the same. These clear statements are not a flippant outline for one way a home could be structured, it is God’s way, and it comes with a clause – “so that the word of God will not be dishonored”.
Now lets move on to the leaders; the providers; the protectors – the Men. As pointed out by Andrew M. Davis in his article on fathers and sons, the law was first given to the male. When Moses gave the commandment, they were clearly for all of Israel, but as men being the head of the house it was their position to teach the commandments to their family. One observation, noted by Davis that supports this view, was the wording of the command “…you shall not covet your neighbors wife…” clearly delivered to men. The same idea is accounted for in Genesis, when it was Adam that God went to after he and Eve sinned. Adam was responsible for Eve.
The leading of a man encompasses many different characteristics. One passage that eloquently describes the leadership of a man in relation to his wife is Ephesians 5:25-30. The husband is to love his wife as Christ loves the church. Christ is his model in giving himself up for his wife so he might sanctify her. A husband is to lead his wife in the word, showering her in truth and teaching her. He plays a key role in her sanctification and is responsible for her. He should selflessly love, nourish and cherish her as he would himself, because when they were married they became one flesh. “Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.(1pet3:7)” This verse illustrates the importance of the husband to consider and honor his wife, and states the consequences if he does not. The treatment a husband gives his wife is apart of and affects his relationship with God. Not adhering to the Lord’s commands concerning his wife can result in the damage of his communication with God. The husband is to lead with Christ being his example.
Marriage is a picture of the relationship Christ has with His church. This portrayal brings the idea of submission and order in the family into a new light, for a better understanding. I don’t often hear Christians talking about how ridiculous it is that we be under the authority of God. Why then, should we speak in such a way in regard to the headship of a husband over his wife? This positioning of women and men remains constant throughout each of their lives, even before marriage, but once “the two become one flesh” in marriage the standard is a bit different.
Before a young woman enters into a marriage covenant she is to submit to the authority in her life, that being God, her parents, and the government. However, once she married she is now under the authority of her husband as well. The same goes for a young man, “he shall leave his father and mother, and be united with his wife, and the two will become one flesh”. One flesh carries with it the meaning of oneness. When a woman and man have joined together they are no longer to consider themselves separate. They are to care for one another, as they would them selves. As was stated earlier, the man is the head of woman, and Christ is the head of man. William Hendriksen once wrote, “This comparison of the husband with Christ reveals the sense in which a man should be his wife’s head…He is her head as being vitally interested in her welfare. He is her protector. His pattern is Christ Who, as head of the Church, is its Savior!”
Thinking of it like this should break down the negative connotation often associated with headship and submission. We know that “If a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand”(mark3:25), and in a house where the head is not defined division will occur. By following the design God has for us, we can maintain unity in a home, instead of buying in to the every man for himself idea that society portrays as most rewarding.
Jesus often spoke to the people in pictures, and analogies and since this fundamental of an orderly hierarchy seems to be an area of great conflict, I also will try to portray it through a few simple examples. In the area of the submission of a wife to her husband, I will liken it to a battle squad I saw described on an Internet gaming forum. After explaining the different roles of a simple squad (containing a commander, squad leader, and squad member) the gamer concluded:
“Without this chain of command you get rambo’s and idiots running around like chickens with their heads cut off and you are not likely to win unless the alien team is equally or even more poorly coordinated and skilled. This will streamline the order system into a more natural form and also allow for far more efficient tasking behaviors among players in a public setting. The commander will be able to focus on strategy, the squad leader can get some fighting with his/her troops and command the specific tactics, and the squad member will know what they are supposed to be doing.”
While not from a “reputable” source and coarsely stated, this quote captures the essence of the importance of an orderly hierarchy. Are we not in a battle? Ephesians 6:12-13 says that we are, and holding to the outline God gives us for the roles of women and men will greatly increase our success.
The view being presented up until this point is generally called Complementarianism, and holds that a husband and his wife complement each through their distantly different roles as spelled out in the Bible. However, there are also different takes on the subject of the roles of women and men. There are many people that take one glance at Complementarianism, and assume that it is in some way chauvinistic, and degrading to women. While there are people out there that would say women are less equal and just need to stay at home, that is not at all what Complementarianism suggests. This view of male dominance and female inferiority is unfortunately a stance many take or assume that Complementarianism states.
Another view is called Egalitarianism, and part of its outlook is that the gender specific roles talked about in the Bible are bound to the culture of that time and don’t apply for us today. So, for Egalitarians anything a woman can do a man can do also (except have children), and vice versa. This view is predominately to counteract those who say a woman is inferior to a man. For an Egalitarian to say that men and women are equal is correct in the sense that in God’s eyes neither is more or less precious. However, that does not mean they each don’t have gender specific roles they are to fill that the other should not. The problem with both of these extreme views is that neither one of them takes into account the order and equality created in Genesis before the fall. The headship of a man to his wife was pre-sin, in a perfect environment, and laid out by God. So no matter what changes come into our culture due to sin or anything else, this principle does not change.
Now that we have a grasp on the roles of men and women in general lets take a look at one of the many passages that is often misunderstood and taken out of context in the Bible. 1 Corinthians 14:34-35 states that wives are to keep silent in the churches, that they are not permitted to speak, and that if a wife wants to learn anything she should ask her own husbands at home because it is improper for her to speak in church. At first glance this looks like it sides with the male supremacy view, but taking a closer look at the rest of the chapter and book clears up this misunderstanding.
The city of Corinth was known for its sin, and associated with sin. In his letter to the church at Corinth, Paul is rebuking them for ungodly practices and instructing them in righteousness. The whole of chapter fourteen is addressing the issue of speaking in tongues and prophesying in the church. In the verses leading up to 34 and 35 Paul talks about the edifying of the church. Paul explains that prophesying and speaking in tongues is meant to edify they body. He then lists examples of how to properly exercise these gifts, and ways they shouldn’t be used. One thing he mentions is that it doesn’t make sense for every one in the church to speak in tongues (1cor14:23,27). A few are enough. He also states in 14:28 that if a man doesn’t have an interpreter he also should keep silent and just talk to God. The Greek words for speak and silent, as used in this verse, are the same as the words for speak and silent in verses 34 and 35. This leads me to believe that its not that the wives weren’t aloud to speak in church at all (in comparison to the man who didn’t have an interpreter), but that it was unedifying to the body for them to prophesy and speak in tongues in church. It was better for the body, and probably their marriage, that they Instead ask their husbands at home.
This passage is specifically talking about married women. There are other passages that suggest that a virgin, in other words an unmarried woman, can prophesy. One of those passages is Acts 21:9. If this is the case, the prohibition given in 1 Corinthians14:34-35 is not only to edify the church, but also to honor the headship of a husband to his wife in marriage as talked about previously in 1 Corinthians 11. The headship in chapter 11 discusses what is honoring and what is not in the context of women praying in church. The women needed to be veiled, not so they would not be seen, but as a symbol of the headship and submission to their husbands. Which ultimately is a picture of the headship of Christ to his bride – The Church.
Making sure we understand the roles of women and men as described in the Bible makes tackling confusing verses like the one above simple. All objects were created for a purpose. Women and men were created different, and for different purposes. Why is it when read verses like 1Pet. 3:7 we take offense at the woman being called the weaker vessel? Personally I see it as a complement. In my Church back home I heard, and enjoyed, it explained something like this: Which is stronger, steel or gold? Steel is obviously stronger than gold but that in no way implies that it is superior to gold. Steel is designed and refined to be strong and used for support. It would be dangerous to replace steel reinforcement with gold. Gold simply wasn’t designed to do that.
In the same way women don’t need to try to be like men; neither do men need to seek to fill the roles of women. Instead each of us should accomplish the tasks that we were created to do. We are the clay and the Lord is the potter, we are all the work of His hands (Is 64:8). In pottery the piece being designed is completely at the potters discretion, and where one day he may need a cup to drink out of, the next he may need a new lid for his toilet. Can the cup do the job of the lid? Can the lid to the job of the cup? No, but each was created to adequately accomplish its own task, and neither is more or less important than the other. But we turn things upside down, as if the potter were thought to be like the clay! Shall what is formed say to him who formed it, “He did not make me”? Can the pot say of the potter, “He knows nothing” (is29:16)? That is exactly what we do when we deny the roles that God has created for us.
Sin in the world brought many consequences with it. One of those consequences is the denial, indignation, and even reversal of the roles of women and men. God is smart enough to design the human body, and knows exactly what it needs to function properly. However, whether we give our bodies what they need to function the way they should is up to us. The same concept is true with the roles God gave to His creation. He laid out the plan for us, and created us to fill our gender specific roles. When we deny His plan we deny His authority are sure to encounter easily avoidable problems. In short, a man is supposed to lovingly lead his wife and his wife is to respectfully submit to her husband as unto the Lord. The husband is not a dictator anymore than his wife is a slave. The two are to love and point each other to Christ.
