Stop Whining

Sunday, June 27th, 2010

The hard part about me writing an article about whining is that its going to sound like I’m whining when I write it. In a sense, I guess I am. Realistically, I hate whining and I hate listening to people whine. Whining, Complaining, Griping, Grumbling, Venting, Murmuring, etc… are all the same to me. I find myself listening for a little while and saying things like, “Well, you know it could be worst.” I had a couple I was counseling whose husband was a slob. He really was. He left the toilet seat up, dirty socks and underwear laying on the floor, and never put anything away. No, it wasn’t me. After listening to the wife complain (legitimately so, some would say), I finally said, “Let’s say that I’m God and I look down out of heaven and say, ‘Boy oh boy do I love my daughter Susie (the wife’s fictitious name), but if there was one thing I would like to see changed about her, it would be _________________.”‘ “How would you fill in that blank?” I asked Susie. She said that God would want her to be more patient. I simply asked, “Do you think God is using your husbands sloppyness to make you more patient like Christ?”

Of course, her husband looked up from his downcast face with a smile and said, “Yeah, honey!” “We’ll get to you in a minute” I said. She smiled and said, “I’ve never thought of it that way.”

You see, the more we complain about our circumstances, the less we see God in the midst of our lives. We begin thinking that God is not in control and surely could not be involved in my life because He would want me happy. That’s simply not true. God doesn’t want you happy, He wants you holy. And complaining is one of the most grievous things to God, the Father.

What about you? Are you a complainer? What do you complain about?

Your job? Or lack of one?
Your spouse?
Your kids?
Your financial situation?
Bad service, food, or product at a grocery store or restuarant?
Bad calls by umpires in your son’s All-Star game?

When we complain…

We don’t trust in the sovereignty of God
We tell God we know better than He does
We don’t believe that ALL things work together for good to glorify God and conform us to the image of Christ
We’re not content and tell everyone that God is not good

There is nothing more counter-cultural today than a person who does not complain. Find one, and you’ve found a rare and precious person. And you probably like to be around them.

Complaining is so often seen in others but we don’t see it in ourselves. No one likes to be around a complainer, and most of us are complainers. We just don’t know it.

I liked what Dan Miller said in a recent podcast as he was talking about the people you hang around with. He said when he was having difficult times, he found successful people and read books about successful people. Misery loves company and when you hang out with people who are doing bad like you are, you end up having a pity party together.

The Bible consistently refers to complaining as sin, and the Apostle Paul writes from prison that we should do all things without grumbling or complaining. He even says there’s a purpose for it.

Look at how the Israelites failed by grumbling:

1 Cor 10:9 “Nor grumble, as some of them did, and were destroyed by the destroyer.”

Exodus 16:2-3 2 And the whole congregation of the sons of Israel grumbled against Moses and Aaron in the wilderness. 3 And the sons of Israel said to them, “Would that we had died by the Lord’s hand in the land of Egypt, when we sat by the pots of meat, when we ate bread to the full; for you have brought us out into this wilderness to kill this whole assembly with hunger.”

Their grumbling was about food… “What’s for dinner? AGAAAAAAIIIIIINNNNN?”

Numbers 16 41 But on the next day all the congregation of the sons of Israel grumbled against Moses and Aaron, saying, “You are the ones who have caused the death of the Lord’s people.” 42 It came about, however, when the congregation had assembled against Moses and Aaron, that they turned toward the tent of meeting, and behold, the cloud covered it and the glory of the Lord appeared. 43 Then Moses and Aaron came to the front of the tent of meeting, 44 and the Lord spoke to Moses, saying, 45 “Get away from among this congregation, that I may consume them instantly.” Then they fell on their faces. 46 And Moses said to Aaron, “Take your censer and put in it fire from the altar, and lay incense on it; then bring it quickly to the congregation and make atonement for them, for wrath has gone forth from the Lord, the plague has begun!” 47 Then Aaron took it as Moses had spoken, and ran into the midst of the assembly, for behold, the plague had begun among the people. So he put on the incense and made atonement for the people. 48 And he took his stand between the dead and the living, so that the plague was checked. 49 But those who died by the plague were 14,700, besides those who died on account of Korah

Their grumbling was about their leaders… “Do you grumble about the pastor? The elders? Your boss? Political leaders?

Korah, Dathan, Abiram and 250 others from among the leaders of Israel rose up against Moses, protesting against his prominence and authority. In the events that followed, these rebels were swallowed up alive by the earth, along with their families (16:28-35). God’s act of discipline, performed at the hand of Moses, did not strike fear into the hearts of the people, who on the following day grumbled against Moses, blaming him for the deaths of those who had perished for their rebellion (16:41).

In Philippians 2, we’re given the command and reason not to grumble. When we grumble, we’re telling everyone everywhere that God is no better than anything else in helping us through difficult circumstances.

James 5:7-11

The term for complain in this passage is Stenazo which means, “to groan within oneself” or “to sigh.” When I read that, I realized that I may not have complained out loud but I sighed more than I should have.

Is there a difference between seeking justice (Isaiah 1) and not complaining?

Complaining and the sovereignty of God:

One of the things Sherry and I continue to find ourselves saying is, “God knows what He’s doing.”

Did you know:

- God works for those who wait for Him? (Is 64:4)

- God withholds no good thing from those who walk uprightly? (Ps 84:11)

- God pursues us with goodness and mercy all our days? (Ps 23:6)

- God works all things together for good to those who love Him? (Rom 8:28)

- God did not spare His own Son but gave Him up for us all and will surely give us all things with Him? (Rom 8:32)

- God supplies every need according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus? (Phil 4:19)

- God will strengthen us, help us, and hold us up by the right hand of His righteousness? (Is 41:10)

- God will never fail us nor forsake us so we can confidently say, ‘the Lord is my helper, I will not be afraid; what can man do to me?” (Hebrews 13:5-6)

- God will complete in me the work He began? (Phil 1:6)

- God disciplines us for our good so that we may share in His holiness? (Heb 12:10)

- God knows the hairs of our heads and not a bird falls to the ground without Him knowing it? (Matt 10:29-30)

- God rejoices to do us good with all His heart and soul (Jer 32:41)

- God rejoices over us with gladness and exults over us with loud singing? (Zeph 3:17)

If these things are true…and they are…why would we ever complain?

Complaining is evidence of little faith in the sovereignty/providence of God in the affairs of our lives. Complaining is unbelief.

If my faith is strong, I will not grumble. If I do not grumble, I will be light in the world. God is good! You can trust Him. Need help? Fill out the form below.

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